Newly found determination

I feel so much better now! It's a hard lesson when you learn that chibitude is no guarantee of happy dealings. But it's good to know. I have since found out through the dollmaking world that the person whom I was dealing with has a history with others of similar experiences.

The reason this makes me feel a million times better, is that now I realize that all the benefit of the doubt that I gave, and the doubts that I still felt after everything started settling, were unneeded.

And I've had a talk with the other person, (the important one) and we're ok, which means SOOOOOOO much more to me. I hate to have hurt anyone in any way. And it was eating at my insides.

There's no denying that I still wish the problems with the original incident had worked out and ended on an up level. I don't like the idea that someone associates Maddy, or chibis with anything negative. But as you've told me, you can't please everyone.

Everything is behind me now, granted I got a little hate mail today, but I can take it. I understand that when someone is hurt, they often need to lash out to feel better. I'm ok with that. I hope that this is the end of all of this, but if not, I've got quite a few more vertebrae in my backbone that are still holding strong.

I'll just keep on keeping on, and not let this change the way I look at people. And even the person whom is upset with me, they still have my compassion.

Really rough week....

I've had such a hard week, actually the past 2 weeks have been pretty rough. I've been having ebay problems.

The biggest problem that I've had was that I didn't listen to everyone who told me what to do, and just kept moving forward, trying to show chibitude and benefit of the doubt. But what happened in the end was that everything just went sour and now I feel so totally unhappy that anything chibi could cause such feelings for all involved. sigh.............

I've been bumming and crumbing all day over this. Contemplating stopping sculpting all together, thinking of taking a couple months off, finding another place to sell, selling directly from my website... those are some of the thoughts. I'm just so upset by all of this.

I just want to crawl under a rock and disappear.

The way that I've always tried to deal with problems, is that if I can please everyone except myself, that's what I'd do. I'd always put my neck out as far as I could to solve something.

But this time, to solve things for one direction, meant hurting in the other direction and visa versa. And though people were telling me that I was doing nothing wrong and that I shouldn't feel bad, I did and do!

There's a part of me that wants to go to my group and whine and let everyone tell me that I did ok, and that I was left no choice.....but I don't like it when people do that. It would make me feel better, but I don't think it would be fair, because then there would only be one side of the story.

Which is pretty much why I'm not saying anything of any substance here either, because although it's my blog, and it's my place to just speak my mind, I still want to be fair to all who were/are involved in my problem.

I guess I just wanted to share that I've had a very emotional week, and a very tough problem on ebay with a customer, and that I tried my ultimate best to be the right kind of person with an open heart and trusting chibitude. But in the end, it was all for naught. I'm unhappy, the other person is unhappy, other people who were directly involved are unhappy, and it just plain sucks!

Chibitude level: 0/10

Today's project

Here's what I've decided on for today. :o) I hope I can do it!

Here's the completed chibi! Really fun to do. The bird was actually a blast when I surrendered to it.

Chibitude level: 8/10 I'm happy, it could have been better though. The angle of the dragons head should be more towards the little birdy. But live and learn. :o) I'll get better with practice.

Just saying hello :o)

I thought I'd pop in for a minute since I've got some extra time while I'm defragging my computer.

I've had a lot of fun the past couple of days doing sketches. Once I've completed my sketches, I like to scan them into my computer and then make a desktop wallpaper of them. This way it's like my computer is saying "ok....you have no excuse...here's your ideas....get busy!!!" :o)

I think I may have some time today to sculpt. I'm hoping. And I've got the chibi picked out that I want to do. I have more snoogie sketches, but I want to do a chibi dragon today. Because of their proportions, they can be in more expressive poses.

I'm going to make a new tag for sketches for this blog, and keep them updated here.

I'm in a pretty good mood today. :o) It looks like today will be peaceful. My desk is basically clean, I've got a little laundry to do, and a kitchen cleaning. But other than that, I think I'll be free today. My hubby will probably be playing some darts (on our front porch), and I hope to go out and play a couple games with him as well. I always lose, he's an awesome dart player.

Chibitude level: 5/10 (because I'm not actually chibi-ing at the moment)

Exhaling.....

It's been over a week since I've posted. Things have been busy over here. And the business kind of blocked my chibitude. But..... it seems that things are starting to settle down. I hope I hope.

In my off-time I'd been sketching, so at least I'd have the ideas ready when I could sculpt.

Today is the first day in a couple of weeks where I didn't have any pending household things to take care of, so I pushed myself into high gear and did some sculpting today.

I've got 5 new Snoogies that are just about ready to be listed. Just one hasn't has her little eyes painted. My back is kind of sore from sitting here for 6 hours (he he) so I'm going to take a little break and watch some Lifetime!! Whoo hoo....brain numbing, crying, and "my life's not so bad" TV.

I'm hoping to have the Snoogie #16's eyes painted this evening, and get them all listed. There are a couple in this batch that I just love so much I hate to see them leave home. But like a good mom, I'm going to let them go to live their own lives. (I just hope they remember me on Mother's day) :o)

Chibitude level: 7/10

Snoogie House Completed :o)

I've finished my 2nd Snoogie house! I really like it. :o) It took a long time to do because of all the different rooms, but it was fun. I need to finish the base on my first Chibi house, because after I do so, I'm going to offer it to my collectors for bidding. I don't know if anyone is interested in these or not, but I sure have fun playing with my chibis on them.

Chibitude level: 10/10 (so happy to be done, and now can play with it)

Snoogie House WIP

The new snoogietushkins house is coming right along. YAY! I'm having lots of fun. And the snoogies moved right in. I had to gather them up and put them back in their old house so that I can work on this one.

Next step is to texture it, and then start painting. The snoogies here said they wanted to help decorate, but we will see. I guess it will depend on how careful they are.

Chibitude level: 10/10 (very happy when I'm in the midst of a project)

Mental Vacation

It's just been over 1 year that since I've made my return to ebay. And I think I'm needing a little vacation for myself. Not a physical one though....just a nice mental vacation maybe to Kiki Valley for a month or so and hang out with all the chibis that haven't visited this world yet.

Maybe just sit around and talk about rocks, or weave little hats out of blades of grass, or even listen to stories of the wise old dragonflies. Maybe I could go and play in the puddles with the boggybittens, or go and guard the parameter of espirit' glen with the leekats. Just something simple and fun, to get my mind off of all this world's day to day little responsibilities.

I think I shall make that a plan for this week, to take a vacation. When I get back, hopefully I have stories to tell!

Chibitude level: 9/10

Snoogietushkins are here!

It was a rough day getting everything ready, but they are officially here now. Mac and I had a brainstorming session, deciding upon a name that was appropriate for them. I shared the story with him, and he and I thought on it for a couple hours. It was Mac's idea to call them Snoogietushkins. I love the name, Mac is so helpful.

I've only listed the first 4 as to not overwhelm people with too much up at once. If you'd like to see them, you can either use the widget at the top of this page, or you can visit this link:
espiritmaddy's items

Thank you to everyone for your support throughout the year of 2007. It has made my coming back to ebay so very enjoyable. I've met such wonderful people and made really great friends.

Happy New Year to everyone!!!!! I look forward to another fun year filled with chibitude!

Chibitude level: 9/10 (I'm sleepy)